You know how there are high frequency sounds that only dogs can hear? Well I think I am excreting a chemical pheromone that only guys under 30 can smell! I mean it! I went out and was surrounded by men my age for three hours. I was hit on exactly once (well twice but by the same guy). Guess who?
Wait for it….
The valet who just happened to look like an 18-year-old James Marsden. At least I’m hoping he’s at least 18! It was his first night on the job and I assume a high-schooler would not be working valet on a school night… but then again the valet did close at 10. How do I know this? Because when I pulled up to the complimentary valet stand to ask for directions to a country bar I could not find, he offered to take my car and walk me over there. I told him it would be easier for me to drive my car to wherever the bar was, and he wouldn’t have to leave his stand.
Then he looked at me with those sexy James Marsden eyes and said, “Please, I’m so bored.”
He was begging.. I had to say yes. But first, I asked him what time the valet closed. He said 10pm. “Well that won’t work,” I told him, because I knew my friend’s band would be on until midnight.
Young James Marsden got really close and showed me a ticket, and told me that he was going to write on it where I was going, then bring my car over there and personally deliver the keys to me at 10pm. Hmmm. Interesting and way above the call of valet duty, so I had to comment. I asked him if this was typically the type of service he provided. He just smiled that seductive James Marsden smile.
I was about to hand over my key, when I said, “Wait a minute, how are you going to remember who I am?” A reasonable question, he was going to be parking for 2 more hours.
“Oh, I couldn’t forget someone as beautiful as you.”
Ruh Roh! Smoooooooth James Valet Marsden! Very smooth. I handed over my keys, but as I was stepping out of the car, he blocked me in with his body, and asked, “how exactly does this car work?”
I was not falling for that, but I was willing to give him a lesson none-the-less, as it is a hybrid and I didn’t want my battery to be dead when I got back.
He leaned into my car as I demonstrated the ONE button that you press to turn the car on and off.
“It’s so quiet,” he marveled. “How do you know it’s on?”
I should have kept my mouth shut, but it’s me…
“It’s just like anything else, when it’s turned, you know.” And with that, I got out of my car, rubbed up against him and put my hand in his hand as I gave him the key. “Now which way did you say the bar was?”
He walked me there. It was in the next shopping center over. Dang my young man attracting pheromones!
A had a great time. Did some line dancing. Ran into a girl whose been going to the same places I have. And sure enough, at 10pm, my young valet stud found me. I pulled his tip out of my pocket and when I handed it to him, he said that he’d better take me outside for a moment so he could show me where my car is.
I followed him out of the bar and really wanted to card him. I mean he couldn’t have been older than 20 and that’s being generous. Even I would have felt very WRONG going there. He showed me where my car was and told me to have fun with a mischievous smile.
At 12:15 pm I found myself in my car… alone the way I always leave a bar, and to my shock, found that James Valet Marsden had left his phone number in my console.
I DID NOT CALL… but, geez! What is with the youngins doing all of the hitting on me?!?!?!?
I need someone to cast a spell on me to attract 40-year-old James Marsden look a-likes!
I’ll save his number just in case I need it… in 5 years when I’m sure he’s over 20!