I want you all to know that when you take the time to comment on my blog, it makes my day. It also makes me think and sometimes rethink what I blog about. Here’s a hilarious message I received from AdventureBiz Babe:
“Back in my dating days, I had all these little “tests” that guys had to pass before I would even consider a relationship with them. Tests like making them take me to Roscoe’s Chicken and Waffles. More than once, I had men say, “Oh my god, we’re the only white people here…….” to which I would reply, “why would you even notice that?”……then the racism would come out.
So…..one of my little “tests” was asking them about former relationships. If all they did was bash everyone they ever dated, that pretty much let me know how they felt about women. And yes, I had men tell me, “my ex was a c@nt”. WHAT? You used the “C” word on our second date???
So I meet this hot guy…….I don’t remember where I met him, but I remember he was a taller look-alike for a young Michael Douglas, only better looking. When I ask him what he does, he says he’s an internet day trader, (read….he doesn’t have a job). This is our first date, and we’re sitting in a restaurant, and I casually bring up former relationships. He starts crying….and I mean CRYING! I say, wow, I am so sorry, insert name here must really have hurt you. To which, he explains that he dated this woman for 4 months, wasn’t really attracted to her, and he’s not crying about her, he is crying because he misses her 13 YEAR OLD DAUGHTER!!! Now, the guy just can’t stop crying. In my head, a red light is going on, and a loud voice is screaming….. he dated her for 4 months, hasn’t talked about her at all, but is crying uncontrollably for her 13 year old daughter? CHILD MOLESTER! Needless to say, I excused myself to the restroom, begged the waitress to let me out the back door, (she completely understood) and blocked his emails.
I had a lot of first dates that I would never have anything to do with again, but this one really stood out!”
SUPER CREEPY!!!! After reading that, not only have I decided to abandon my theory of dating guys I wouldn’t be interested in, but I’ve decided to not date guys at all… ever again.
Instead, my new approach is that I’m going to have my parents do an arranged marriage. Here are my reasons:
1. They are paranoid about who I date after the Shady debacle and will do the necessary background check
2. My mom has very good taste when it comes to looks.
3. She is also super critical so she will grill the guy beyond the call of motherly duty and rule out all ‘hot messes’
4. They seem to want me in a relationship more than I care about being in one, which is only because I’m lazy and not wanting to meet the guys that AdventureBiz Babe dated.
5. Any man who would agree to an arranged marriage in this day and age AND have my parents approval, must be as cool and sick of the dating scene as me.
It’s kinda ridiculous for me to say I’m sick of the dating scene, when technically I have been on maybe 3 dates since 2008. I guess the “sick of it” comes from the thought of the process. Then I look at Loverville and she’s been on like 194 first dates in the last few years. And the girl has a grueling work schedule!
So, yeah, I’m just lazy. And as you know if you read this blog, you could not describe me as lazy in any other area of my life, so I’m also avoiding. I can’t think of any past date trauma that I’ve encountered. The only bad part of dating for me is when I’m not interested in seeing the guy again even though we had a lot of laughs and good conversation, because the attraction is just not there for me… and no, he will NOT grow on me. It’s so awkward to have to tell a guy who thinks he rocked a date that there will not be a next one. It’s like Ashley sending Ben home after he proposed, only it was only one date so he’s not as traumatized as Ben.
Seriously, I don’t want to date. I just don’t. But if I don’t this blog is going to get really boring. I guess I’ll do it for you all… but I don’t have to like it!