Okay, so I was 779 words into my blog entry when I recognized that I had crossed over. I was joking around about a romance novel my mom had taken out from the library, that I was returning for her. It was a period novel, but when I opened up to a random page, I discovered that they were having sex in very graphic ways back in days of yore. So being a chick lit girl, I thought I’d mock the romance novels by writing my own ‘scene of passion’ for you…
Ladies, it turned into pure erotica. What can I say? I have a muse. And while some men prefer to remember past experiences, I’m all about the imagination. Mine went a little too wild to print. Actually wild is the wrong word. Wild is how I usually imagine, but this never-to-be-published entry was not what I usually imagine. It was filled with anticipation. He was gentle, slow, and while it tormented me, it… UGH! There I go again!
I think I need a cold shower, but it’s too late and I’m already in bed… yes, with my computer. Maybe I should distract myself with thoughts of Rocker Yogi or Josh, the hot bartender who winked at me every time he gave me a virgin drink tonight.
Nope! Hot young boy distractions are not working. I wonder if the Yankees won tonight? Nope! Not even thoughts of baseball are helping. I thought that was a sure thing. Maybe just for guys. Maybe there’s a shoe sale happening somewhere…
That almost worked. Hold on, I’m going to go re-read that entry (I have it saved in my draft file)…
… I’m back. And who thought that was a good idea… to re-read that? Not good. I mean the writing’s good. Maybe I can sell it to an erotica magazine. Man, it’s hot in here! Shoe sale… shoe sale…
Okay, what else can I blog about?
Nothing! There’s a huge purple elephant in this room.. I mean in this small white box that I’m typing in. I can just imagine what Page Turner is going to put in the comment box. No Page, I’m not going to print it. It is out of genre for this blog. Besides, my sister reads this, and she is pure and innocent and thinks I’m a virgin… which Sister, I am.
I know this is a short entry, but I don’t know where else to go with this. My mind is on one thing right now… the last 700 words of that entry that haven’t been written yet. Dare I finish?
romanticcomedygirl 
HA! Yes I totally think you should just share what you wrote and I love you for knowing that’s EXACTLY what I’m thinking. BUT we have more issues things to address here! A shoe sale? Is that really what you think about to turn it off? Seriously? That would just get me going. Think of all those sexy and delicious shoes? I get delirious in shoe sales, how do they not get you a little bit hot!? AND baseball? Ummm have you looked at those asses and really the only guys who have better asses than ball players are ballet dancers but those guys don’t usually play for the right team which is even more frustrating! I digress . . . or am I tangentilizing? I’d tell you what I think you should do but as you said out of genre . . . damn it now I have to go read some Anais Nin!
So THAT’S why none of my go-tos were working. You’re so right! Next time I’ll think of leather belts.. hmm, nope, that won’t work. Ice Cream… nah too 9 1/2 weeks. I’VE GOT IT! Babies! Yup! That will kill the mood immediately! Thanks Page!