Yep, that’s what Cowgirl said to me after I made a formal announcement that I received 48 emails from the Superfriends while I was having sex. That’s a lot of emails, granted FWB has the stamina of an 18-year-old so we were at it for a while, but still that’s a lot of emails. The Superfriends seem to be at odds over whether it’s okay to get a little somthin’ somethin’ while we are at one of our 5-star retreats.
As someone who has waited almost 2 years for sex, I’m going to have to give a HUGE endorsement to this idea. The Superfriends are ALL Type-A Girls, who work their asses off, and have huge responsibilites, like kids, parents, staff, companies, and all of these things bring stress and a need for control. Guess what’s a great de-stressor and a fabulous opportunity for letting go of control? A few hours of Somethin’ Somethin’
I definitely want Cowgirl to get some. Sommelier too, but I only have room for one picture in today’s post so it’s going to Cowgirl.
Here’s the thing, if you haven’t read her description, she’s frickin’ hot! And lately the only thing she’s been riding is a horse… and that’s not a joke. That sexy bod needs to get some action! I bet the kids on American Idol are getting action… I bet they’re not sitting home eating cereal! They’re famous, they’re rockstars! Well guess, what? When we go to our 5-star retreats WE ARE THE ROCKSTARS and it’s time to start living like them… minus throwing heavy expensive stuff out of windows into swimming pools and doing scary drugs that can kill us. And what is the number one thing that Rockstars are known for? Groupies.
Therefore, when a hot boy-toy, who is not dumb or angry but IS locationally challenged, is on the dance floor with you and can’t stop hugging you… it’s time to lasso that boy in, hog-tie ’em, and eat him like Southern barbeque… slowly and relishing each bite!
Now, if I know Cowgirl, she’s blushing, even though she’s home alone reading this in front of her computer. And I know DJ Super Pilot will probably dig up some song about peer pressure and give me a good scolding. And I’m sure Sommelier is getting warm from her red wine as she anticipates what I’m going to write for her assignment on our trip. BUT I don’t care, because Nutritionist won’t let me have chocolate so I’m having sex instead, and I want to spread the joy… and it is joyous!!!!!!!!!!
Now, I feel there needs to be some kind of formal pact made, that there is at least the intention to get somethin’ somethin’ while on our trip, this way no one will feel weird or slutty about having a roll in the hay (I have to keep using farm references because this is dedicated to Cowgirl). So here is my proposal for The Pact:
Cowgirl will get buck wild with a man at least 8 years younger than her…
Sommelier will have a “nameless” encounter (that means you don’t know his name and he doesn’t know yours)
DJ Super Pilot will eat raw food off of a chiseled man’s naked body
If not for yourselves, do it for all of the readers out there who will never go on a business trip and get an opportunity like this and want to read about it here… because they WILL read about it here, so spare no details.
When you get back to reality, you can go back to searching for the soulmate who will be more likely to show up when you’re feeling confident and revved up after a night of fabulous Somethin’ Somethin’!