I’ve decided to leave my Type-A Overachiever Attitude out of my dating life. If I didn’t I’d be beating myself up for being on day 4 and still not past step 3. Get Out. Because I had such a lame “Get Out” on the day I as supposed to do it, I’ve made a conscious effort the last two days. The obstacle has been getting from step 3. Get Out to step 4. Speak to Strangers. I’ll elaborate on that, though first, I want to get past Step 3. so here goes:
I’ve put some thought into this.. a strategy if you will, so yesterday I went to 3 places:
1. I chose a place where I would like to go and would therefore thought if I met a guy there, we would like to do similar things. It was a 100-acre Japanese Garden and Museum. The gardens were beautiful. I spent two and a half hours walking around and sitting on benches, overlooking ponds of giant koi fish and turtles. I summoned some breathtaking orange and black birds to sit by me and join in my meditation. I even attracted a bunny. I tend to attract bunnies, not as often as hummingbirds, but enough that I notice. Well, I learned two things at the Japanese gardens: 1. Only guys who get dragged there by their girlfriend or are gay, go to Japanese gardens and 2. Furisodes are the most important kimono for a young unmarried woman. Furisode means swinging sleeves, and the more vibrant the colors, the better to attract potential suitors. The longer the sleeve the younger the woman. So basically the Japanese can walk around in a Kimono and depending on the style, color, and length of the sleeves, a guy can tell they are available, their age group, and that they’re good to go.
2. The second place I went was a nice restaurant that reminded me of dining in Napa Valley. The food was delicious, but when I went to hang out in the bar after, I saw IC’s mom. Remember that sinking feeling I DIDN’T feel when I saw Shady? Well I got it when I saw IC’s mom, so I headed out of there so it wouldn’t be awkward and headed to…
3. “The Avenue” which is blocks and blocks of restaurants and stores that are packed with people of all ages hanging out, listening to live music, drinking, being merry… and in the case last night, NOT being my type.
Today I took a more practical approach. Dating Guru has not yet told me to make a list of what I want in a guy, so I’m not sure if that is an assignment, (but as I said in a previous entry, if it is, I will post it here) but if I were to make a list, one thing that would definitely be on it is: Handy.. not Magruber handy.. Macgyver handy. So today I went to… not one.. not two.. but THREE different Home Depots.
Here’s why transitioning from step 3. Get Out to step 4. Speak to Strangers has eluded me. You see, I speak to strangers ALL THE TIME. I have no problem striking up a conversation with someone in an elevator, on line at the grocery store, sitting next to me in a movie theater- anywhere. I could probably start up an interesting conversation with an inmate in a prison. Literally I can talk to people who don’t speak English, and we make it work. The problem is, Step 4 has an underlying agenda. The purpose of speaking to a stranger, is to see if he is potential dating material. There was not one stranger whom I wanted to start a conversation with. I was not attracted to one guy in any of the places I’ve been in the past two days, except one of the gay guys at the Japanese Garden, but clearly when I struck up the conversation about the Bonsai Tree, he humored me, but had no intention of switching teams. And once again, my childhood Poo-ge Envy rears it’s ugly head.
I’m going to have to skip Step 4 and here’s why.. and Dating Guru, correct me if I’m wrong, because I have no trouble starting up a conversation with a stranger, I don’t feel I need practice in this area. I feel very much at ease breaking the ice with a guy I’m attracted to. The challenge is finding a guy I’m attracted to. So, it appears I’m on to Step 5. Join an Online Dating Website (and for those of you reading this blog for the first time, you can read about the steps at Love and Life Blog).
It looks like my next blog entry will be my online profile for your feedback. Did I mention 67 times that I’m NOT looking forward to Step 5? Well just incase, here’s #68: I AM NOT LOOKING FORWARD TO INTERNET DATING!!!